Why I’m Probably Going to Die Young

If I don’t get arrested fairly soon, there’s a good chance that I’ll get murdered. One of these two unfortunate occurrences will happen to me. I guarantee it.

And one way I can guarantee it is by doing Incredibly Stupid Dangerous Things. I’m a college student. College students are invincible, right?

Wrong.

Lucky for me, I haven’t had to find this out the hard way. Yet. Stay tuned, though, since it can’t be long now.

One particularly grand lapse of judgment I had came one night when I was bored out of my mind.

Take some advice from me: if you’re ever in college and bored out of your mind, get a hobby. A nice, productive hobby like knitting or partying! Don’t follow in my footsteps.

I proceeded to go on an app called Yik Yak. If you’re a student yourself, you’ve probably heard of this app. It allows you to post anonymously, and your messages can only be see by people located in your immediate area. It’s especially popular on campus because, well, everyone’s in the same place.

Image from play.google.com
Yik Yak can be used for good. You can vent on it, encourage people on it, hell, once I even scored two pieces of bread from someone in my dorm because I asked on Yik Yak.  I made a fabulous sandwich that day.

There is a sketchy side of this app, like most things in the world. People frequently try to hook up on it and sell drugs, among other less favorable activities.

Yik Yak is also a way for people to make anonymous threats, unfortunately.  Image from statepress.com
As I was scrolling through my feed, I came across a post that was asking if anyone wanted to go to an abandoned town with them. I looked it up and it was 40 miles away from civilization. I was willing to bet that there were already like, 4 bodies buried there somewhere. Maybe a serial killer who skinned and ate cats had made the town their home base. At the very least there was probably a hungry animal or two hiding out in the buildings.

But, like I explained to you in my last entry, I have a penchant for urban exploring. So, little five-foot-nothing me replied with an enthusiastic, “Yes! Take me!”

Most plans I’ve tried to make on Yik Yak fell through, so I was sufficiently surprised when the guy actually showed up.

Oh, it was nighttime by the way. I felt like I was in a bad horror movie.

I walked over to this guy’s Honda CRV and peered in the window. I didn’t see any tools, blood, or dismembered body parts lying around, and there was a Star Wars bumper sticker on the back window. Everything seemed okay.

As soon as I slid in the passenger seat I said, “I have pepper spray. So. You know.”

“I know what?”

I blinked.

“Don’t try anything.”

“I wasn’t planning on trying anything. I was more worried about picking up a dangerous girl who might murder me and leave me for dead.”

I busted out laughing. Me? Secretly I hated carrying pepper spray because I knew in the unlikely event that I’d have to use it, there was a high probability I’d end up spraying myself.

Image from funnyjunk.com
Anyways, I went to the abandoned town of Two Guns in the middle of the night with a complete stranger. You can see why I’m going to die young.

Please enjoy the following pictures documenting my poor life choices.

Much love,

-V

Taken inside of the abandoned gas station. I also found a lot of documents from ancestry.com in here. I wonder what someone was trying to find in their family history.

This is part of an abandoned zoo, where the owner was allegedly killed by a mountain lion.
  

The main part of the gas station

An old cage from the abandoned zoo
P.S. Later I went back during the daytime, so here are a few more…

I think this was some sort of tiny hotel, since there was a pool and what looked like a pool storage shed or restrooms located next to it.

Inside the tiny hotel

Here’s the front of the gas station.
Inside the tiny hotel
Taken from the bottom of the pool
This is the back door of the tiny hotel

Possibly part of the old zoo

Why I’ll Probably be Arrested

Your imaginations are probably running wild right now.  What did I do that’s going to get me arrested?  Did I kill a man?  Steal my neighbor’s new Apple TV?  Snort cocaine off the back of my illegal pet lion?

Image from lionking.wikia.com

No, nothing like that.  I know, it’s disappointing.  Sorry, guys.

I do, however, have one particular hobby that’s frowned upon by law enforcement, if not downright illegal.  This is a wonderful activity widely known as urban exploring.

For those of you who don’t know, a rough definition of urban exploring is when one ventures into abandoned buildings and other places normally off limits to the public.  I love doing this.  There’s just something about old, long forgotten places that really attracts me.  Just think about it -a crumbling house on the side of the road was once someone’s home.  They laughed there, cried there, had fights, triumphs  and tragedies, sang songs and cooked dinners.  And now there’s nothing left.

If anyone has read Paper Towns by John Green (mild spoiler alert!), you might recall the abandoned mini mall that Margo led Q to.  That’s a good example of urban exploring.

Representation of the Osprey; Image from wordsontheshelf.blogspot.com

I like walking through these hollow shells while trying to imagine this rich and colorful past.  It really does wonders for writer’s block, that’s for sure.

My first conquest was a ramshackle house at the back of a neighborhood.  It was known as the Tiger House to all the kids in the area because of the story behind it.  I’m not sure if it’s true or not, but I’ve heard quite a few different variations.

The basic gist is this:  A man in the neighborhood kept tigers in his backyard.  This was illegal, much like keeping a lion as a pet and snorting cocaine off its back is illegal.  Despite the law, Tiger Man’s big cats remained in the large cages where he showed them off to friends and family whenever he got the chance.  One day, Tiger Man was feeding his exotic pets while his wife and son were at the store.  He was mauled and killed by a tiger and died in the backyard.  Upon returning home and finding her husband’s mutilated body, the wife hung herself and her child from the tree in the backyard.

Of all the versions of this story, the most consistent detail is the guy getting killed by a tiger.  That’s about the extent of my knowledge on the house’s history.

Now, when I first heard about this place, I thought it was total BS.  What nut job would try to keep tigers?  It sounded ridiculous, but I was intrigued.

My first excursion to the house was at night.  The first thing I noticed was a rusty streetlamp that looked like it was from the 1800’s.  It was pretty creepy.  Next I was able to make out the outline of a broken metal cage among the weeds…

The inside of the house was absolutely covered in graffiti.  Some of it was juvenile, like an assortment of dick pics along with lewd phrases, but there were a few more artistic pictures.  I liked the floor-to-ceiling depiction of a red demon the best.

Here’s a photo of the outside of the house that I took during the day:

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I really wish I’d taken more pictures, but both times that I was there during the day I was nearly caught by the authorities.  Needless to say, it’s very difficult to sprint from a cop while taking excellent photographs.

The second time I had to run my friend basically tossed me over a brick wall.  Also not a great photo op.

To wrap it up, that’s why I’m probably going to get arrested one day.  Next month I’m staying a few days in LA, and I’ve already started looking up any potential trespassing opportunities.

Much Love,

-V